Doing battle with daily dragons

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Superstition Ain't The Way

We went to see The Cheerful Idiot last night. First off the bat, we were relieved that he wearing trousers, which is a definite improvement on last week when Pretty Boy knocked on his door and he answered it in Y fronts. I think that’s probably still all PB can see when he closes his eyes.

The Idiot was vexed. He’d just broken two mirrors trying to arrange them in an aesthetically pleasing pattern on his bathroom wall. The girl currently sharing his abode, who we shall call The Barmaid, revealed to us that he’d recently consumed almost an entire bag of sugar.

He seemed rather unconcerned over the implications of the shards of reflective glass that now covered his upstairs hallway. “14 years bad luck? I can’t imagine that my luck could get any worse than it has been over the last 7 months.” I think he’s wrong however and will discover this himself when he next makes a dental appointment.

Superstitions are funny things- hangers on from times before science took away all of our ghosts. I’m not a terribly superstitious person, but according to those who believe that a reflection in a mirror is actually your soul, The Idiot should have waited for 7 hours before cleaning up the pieces and then buried the shards in a deep hole by moonlight. To me, that counter spell sounds a little like one of those children’s books where you can create your own silly person by flipping 3 or 4 sections around giving someone the head of a woman, the body of a chicken and the feet of a clown.

If You…

- Break / Step on / Spill / Walk Under / Pass By / Trip Over / Bump Into / Accidentally Impale /

- A Mirror / A Cat / Salt / A Ladder / A Sparrow / An Elephant / A Witch /

- Immediately / Never / Always / Sometimes / Next Tuesday /

- Throw It / Turn Around / Curse / Pinch Your Nose / Spit / Flip the Bird /

- Once / Twice / Three Times / Four Times

- Over Your Shoulder/ Around Your Head / Between Your Legs / At Grandma’s House

- At the Full Moon / On a Moonless Night / Under a Tree / By a Crossroads / On a Moderately Sunny Day With Temperatures in the Mid-Teens /

I personally have very few personal superstitions other than throwing spilt salt over my shoulder. I couldn’t tell you why I do this since the devil at my shoulder probably isn’t going to be perturbed by a little salt in his eye.

Other manias welcome.