Doing battle with daily dragons

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Weeping and Gnashing of Teeth

Okay, here’s a confession. I am a total girl. Not in the standing on a footstool and screaming at spiders kind of way or anything, but I have to admit to having very little stimulus to precipitate extreme waterworks.

This is difficult living in Britain. Sitting in an America movie theatre after some tear jerker, you could expect many ladies exiting with their mascara running freely, but here, you are fixed with looks that clearly states, “Get a grip.” Women are sort of naturally emotional due to the fact that our bodies are built to release thousands of mind altering hormones once a month. Once in college, in a bout of severe PMS, I remember welling up because of a commercial on television. The product? Cotton. It was an ad for the cotton industry proclaiming that “Cotton is the fabric of our lives.” I was completely undone.

Tears are, of course, completely natural and normal in circumstances like weddings, graduations, funerals or extreme emotional duress. I’m afraid to admit however, that my outbursts are not limited to these occasions. (Totally losing my cool during the song “When She Loved Me” in the middle of “Toy Story 2” comes to mind. Don’t try to tell me that you don’t secretly think your childhood toys miss you.) So, here’s my thing for today:

Please describe a public occasion (other than those mentioned above) where you have been unlucky enough to begin leaking from your ocular region.